What's in a Name?

Now that I’ve captured your attention by using that screenshot of 1996’s Romeo & Juliet, let me explain. Juliet says to Romeo:

So let’s get into it…

It’s that most wonderful time of the year again. The leaves have changed colors and begun falling gracefully to the ground. The wind swings by with a crisp chill. The smell of comforting charcoal burning away reminds you of a warm and cozy memory. What time is it? It’s time to explain what my name is.

So, in the past few years I’ve had to move often, so therefore meet new people and introduce myself. Or perhaps it’s time to meet someone in real life that has only known me from Facebook. My name on FB is Omae Umma.

But.

My Pakistani parents honored me with the Arabic name Umme Farwah.  Umme Farwah was the name of ImamHassan’s (a.s.) wife, the mother of Qasim (a.s.). Technically, Umme is the “title,” so Farwah was the name, but my family only called me Umme (soft oomeh). I never knew anyone else with that name. Now I know of a couple with the entire Umme Farwah name and several with the Farwah name (often spelled Farwa).

So in Kindergarten,  Ms. Clymer kept calling me “Ooomee,” and I guess we must have told her it was wrong because I have a distinct memory of her telling me to stand up in front of the entire class to pronounce my name correctly. I only remember being too shy to say it in front of everyone and whispered in her ear.

My next memory is being in 2^nd or 3^rd grade with a boy asking, “If your name starts with a U why is it pronounced “OMAY?” So apparently (I don’t remember why), by then, everyone was pronouncing my name as OMAY and I was telling them that it was correct.

So, cut to the day I became a naturalized U.S. citizen around 10 years old. I was told to write my name on the form in any spelling I wanted. I decided to spell it as UMMA FARVA because I felt like adding the A at the end of Umm made it easier to pronounce (maybe I had heard of Uma Thurman by then? I don’t know). And I changed Farwah to Farva because that’s how it sounded to me, with a V sound.

Still, everyone at school was calling me “OMAY.” At some point, I decided to spell it as OMAE on all my school papers though it was and has been UMMA FARVA on all my legal documents in the United States.

There was one time in high school that I decided to go by Farva. That did not go well either because my best friend’s name was Farah and the teachers kept getting us confused and whatever.

The next year I decided to by Umma. So there it was Umma. Umma. Umma. OK, so everyone I met in an academic or work related situation, from high school into college called me Umma.

HOWEVER, sometimes I’d meet someone outside of school or work and tell them my name was Omae.

I guess I “feel” mostly like Omae, but there are a lot of people that still call me Umma—and that feels right too!

Other folks say Umme. And sometimes a random person will decide to call me the technically correct Farwah. I like those too.

So basically I’m Omae, Umma, Umme, Farwah, and Umme Farwah.

Yes, it’s confusing. Yes, it’s exhausting! I don’t blame anyone for wondering what the deal is.

I will always wish I had an easy name such as Sara or Fara or Zara or Emma! Life would have been easier, especially in school! Don’t get me started at how terrible it was when we’d have a substitute teacher who would take roll call, pronounce it strangely and give the other kids a good laugh at me.

And my husband says in Iran, Farwah would be pronounced as Farveh. Great. Just great.

Is it too late to change it to Sara?

Yes, yes, I know. My original name is beautiful. But my name story has been a roller coaster. 

A rose is a rose is a rose.

Tell me your name story.